"If
you must choose, take a good name rather than great riches; for to be
held in loving esteem is better than silver and gold." (Proverbs 22:1,
TLB)
“And he said to them:
"You have a fine way of setting aside the commands of God in order to
observe your own traditions! For Moses said, 'Honor your
father and your mother,' and, 'Anyone who curses his father
or mother must be put to death.' But you say that if a man says to his
father or mother: 'Whatever help you might otherwise have received from
me is Corban' (that is, a gift devoted to God), then you no longer let
him do anything for his father or mother. Thus you nullify the word of
God by your tradition that you have handed down. And you do many things
like that." (Mark 7:9-13. NIV)
Observations:
I asked
myself what are the comparisons Jesus makes.
Comparison 1:
‘You have
a fine way of setting aside the commands of God in order to observe your
own traditions.’
Comparison 2:
For Moses
said, ‘Honor your father and mother, ‘and, ‘Anyone who curses his father
or mother must be put to death.’ But you say that if a man says to his
father or mother: ‘Whatever help you might otherwise have received from
me is Corban’ (that is, a gift devoted to God), then you no longer let
him do anything for his father or mother.
Comparison 3:
'Thus you
nullify the word of God by your tradition that you have handed down. And
you do many things like that.’
Interpretation:
I asked
myself what it means to ‘honor’ someone.
What came to my mind is when honor is bestowed upon
someone they are valued and treated specially. They are spoken well of
and they feel honored. What they have done and contributed is
recognized. They are given honorary titles. They are respected and many
times their needs are met by those honoring them. They are taken care
of.
I asked
myself what it means to ‘honor father and mother’.
For me it means to make them
feel valued and treat them specially. It means to speak well of them and
make them feel honored to be my parents. It means to recognize what they
have done for me and how they have contributed to my life. It
means giving them honorary titles. It means to respect them, take care
of them, and meet their needs when I am able to. This is what honoring
father and mother means to me.
Implications:
I saw important implications for
my own life. There are no but’s and if’s when it comes to honoring
father and mother for me. Honoring my father and mother is not the same
as being obedient to them. We can honor someone by our actions and still
let them see if what they are asking us goes against the Word of God, it
is something we cannot do. Honor has a lot to do with our words and
actions even when we cannot always obey what our parents want for us
when it is contrary to God’s Word. They need to see it in a loving way
and not ‘it’s my life and I choose to do what I want so keep away’. That
is not what honoring father and mother is for me. I can share with them
what I feel convicted of what the Lord wants me to do with my life and
ask for their blessings. This is showing honor to them too. Whether they
give their blessings or not, is not up to me. I did my part in honoring
them. I need to leave the results in the Lord’s hands. This approach
should be taken in our careers, academics, relationships, etc to involve
our parents and not shut them out.
Honoring parents does not stop
when we turn 18. Jesus was speaking to the Pharisees and teachers of the
law and they were more than 18. Jesus wanted them to continue to honor
their father and mother. Jesus was upset with them because they were not
doing that. They were twisting God’s Word for the sake of tradition and
ignoring their parents. Jesus was not happy with that. Jesus spoke about
gifts devoted to God or tithing but at the same time Jesus did not want
parents to feel dishonored. Jesus wanted parents needs to be met and at
the same time gifts devoted to God or tithing to be met too. This is
included somewhere else in Scripture but cannot remember the reference.
It is very interesting when God
gave the commandments to Moses, the first 4 commandments were man’s
responsibility to God. It was for a vertical relationship between
Man-God. The next 6 commandments were man’s responsibility to man. It
was for a horizontal relationship between human beings.
But, the first commandment for a
horizontal relationship between human beings started right at home.
After the Lord gave the first 4 commandments, the Lord gave the 5th
commandment which had to do with parents. All the other commandments
followed. I believe this is because so much emphasis was put upon
honoring and respecting parents after giving honor and respect to God
since the Lord placed them in authority over us.
The fifth commandment with a
promise states,
"Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the
land the LORD your God is giving you.” (Exodus 20:12, NIV)
“Children, obey
your parents in the Lord, for this is right. "Honor your father and
mother"—which is the first commandment with a promise— "that it may go
well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.”(Ephesians
6:1-2, NIV)
Obedience and honor are
mentioned simultaneously. This tells me to that there is a difference
between obedience (when we are children) and honor (when we are children
and become adults)
The Pharisees and teachers of
the law have not done that and that made Jesus really mad. All their
religious devotion and what they were doing really meant nothing to
Jesus because they were not honoring their parents.
God emphasizes honoring parents
so seriously that death became the sentence for those dishonoring
parents or cursing them. That is really powerful and shows us how much
God wants us to honor our parents and never curse them.
Honoring parents is not based on
what they have done for us or what they do to us. Honoring parents is
because God wants us to honor them.
As we are obedient to the Lord,
He will take care of us. Even as I write this, I am reminded of families
where children are sexually abused, physically abused, verbally abused,
where children are ignored by the parents, etc.
Our Lord knows that happens and
those He gave to protect His children do not take their responsibility
seriously and forfeit that responsibility because of their actions.
It is because of that there are
wonderful organizations our Lord placed here on earth that come to the
rescue of God’s children. Many times children are removed from their
parents home because they are neglected and abused. Our Lord does not
want that to happen to His precious children. If parent/s whom the Lord
placed over a child to take care of them abuse that privilege and
responsibility, the Lord will place those children where they can be
loved and take care of. We live in a sinful world and sadly bad things
happen to children.
One thing I learned is we can
watch out for children who may be abused or neglected and take it upon
ourselves to meet their needs whether it is by adopting them, placing
them in loving homes who want to have children, etc
I mention all this because
honoring parents does not mean living through the abuse as children.
When the Lord places someone in authority over someone else, in this
case parents over children, they are placed there to take care of them.
When that authority is abused, in essence they lose the right to take
care of them.
However, when that person grows
up and becomes an adult, they still have responsibility to honor their
parents and not ignore them. This is what I believe strongly and when
God gives us a commandment, He will help us.
I ask you
now dear friend, how do you honor your parents?
Dear friend, parents are placed
in your life to take care of you here on earth. The Lord sees the role
of parents so important that it is the first of the commandments with a
promise that when we honor our father and mother, our life will be
blessed. We may not see the blessings right away but God always keeps
His promises.
You may not have a good
relationship with your parent/s because of what may have happened in
your life. The Lord knows about it friend and will meet you where you
are at as you wait upon Him. Whatever happens we should never curse our
parents no matter how mad we are at them, etc. Also, honoring parents
means to speak respectably of them when we speak to others.
Respect is using words such as
my mother, my father, my mama, my papa, my mom, my dad, my mommy, my
daddy, etc and not ‘my old man, my old woman’. That is so disrespectful
and dishonorable. Sadly, I see that happen even among young students who
address their parents that way to friends.
Your parents maybe old or young,
but they still need to be respected. If they are old, they need more
respect as our elders. When we honor our mother and father, the Lord
knows that and He becomes very pleased with us.
We should always be aware of our
parents needs and try to meet them where they are at even when we have
our own families. As long as the Lord places them here on earth until
the day they go to be with Him, we have a responsibility and commandment
to honor them and take care of them. Even after they leave this earth,
we should always honor them among our own children.
Parents do not usually ask their
kids for help unless they are really desperate. It should not even come
to that stage if we keep up with how our parents are doing.
Jesus took, taking care of
parents very seriously. Jesus first addressed honoring parents, then not
cursing them, and finally meeting their needs. When Jesus was crucified,
Jesus called for his disciple John and asked him to take care of his
mother Mary. When wine ran out during a wedding festivity, His mother
went to Him and asked for help. Jesus honored Mary, His mom by doing
what she asked.
Whatever opportunities I have, I
take it as a privilege and honor to help my parents if I think they are
in need. Through my years of campus ministry, financially I was in a jam
and it was my parents that the Lord used to meet my needs. Even when I
lived away from home, my dad would always tell mom to please call Ramesh
home so he could have a home-cooked meal even when doing ministry is not
something my dad agreed with.
Wherever my brothers are even
when we have dishonored them by our actions, they always care for us and
shepherd us, especially my mommy. I am so thankful to the Lord for
both my parents even when I do not agree with certain things.
I will not deny having a dad who
follows Jesus Christ would make so many things better for me but I know
whoever the Lord places in our lives, there is a reason for that and I
need to adhere to the commandments of God. My dad has come a long way
and now even listens to ministry programs with us.
Our actions speak louder than
words. If our parents are not believers and we are followers of Christ,
all we say to them may leave from one ear to the other but if they see
us living our lives to the teachings of Jesus, they will notice the
difference and take notice even if they have been hostile for days,
months, or years.
Honoring parents does not mean
we dishonor God or be disobedient to God. I became a follower of Jesus
Christ because Jesus is the Way, the Truth, and the Life. No man comes
to the Father except through Jesus.
My dad is not a follower of
Jesus Christ but a Hindu by background. There were things he did not
want me to do. One of the things was marrying a Christian girl who loves
Jesus when the time comes. I can honor my dad by explaining to him why I
think it is so important without stating, ‘it is my life and I should be
able to do what I want’. Honor can be given even if it means having to
choose the way our Lord wants for us. My dad now understands how
important it is for me a marry someone who loves Jesus Christ and is a
follower of Jesus Christ.
My life has not been easy having
one parent who is Hindu by background but even through that Jesus has
used my mommy who is a converted born-again Christian to help me so
much. No matter how mad I have been with my dad for a lot of things, my
mom always would remind me the importance of honoring my dad even if I
was mad. In other words, I should not lash out. It has not been easy for
me and I have messed up in the past but I am more determined now to
honor both my parents and am so thankful for the Lord’s grace and mercy.
I want to share with you a poem
the Lord helped me write years ago to help others deal with their
parents.
Peace
Through Petrifying Parenting (Read Ephesians 6:1-3)
By Ramesh C. Reddy (http://www.pitt.edu/~rcrst6/Devotional.html)
Your parents are always on
your case?
Always in your face?
Feel like you are hit with
mace?
Cause from your parents so
much interference?
That's making you so tense?
Feel like you are surrounded
by electrical fence?
Whatever your parents say,
doesn't make no sense?
For your own way, you have no
clearance?
You can still be glad.
You won't need to be
constantly sad
Jesus Christ loves you more
than your Mom or Dad(Isa 43:1-6)
Jesus will always be on your
side. (John 14:18)
Jesus Christ will let you
happily glide. (Psalm 28:17)
Jesus loves you more than you
can comprehend (John 15:13)
Your wounds Jesus will mend (Psa
147:3)
He can change your parents’
heart (Matt 19:26)
Please depend on Christ
giving Him a start (Rev 3:20)
Jesus will do His part (Psa
32:8)
If your parents are wrong,
Christ will let them Know.
And make you on the right
path Go. (Jer 29:11)
As you OBEDIENCE, according
to God's Will Sow. (Eph 6:1)
Friend, whatever your
relationship with your parents is, Jesus knows about it. Jesus loves you
so much and cares for you. Yes, He does and every commandment our Lord
gives is for our own good. May you know how much Jesus loves you and
depend on Him to honor your father and mother! Amen!
“Please
Always Respect Everyday, Now Trusting Savior!”(P.A.R.E.N.T.S)/”How
do you honor your parents?”
Prayer:
Dear Lord Jesus, thank you for loving me so much. Thank you for dying
for my sin and coming back to life to save me. I am so sorry for all my
sins especially for the times you have brought to my attention when I
have dishonored my parents. Forgive me Oh Lord and help us all to honor
our parents/guardians you have placed over us. Help us to be there to
meet their needs when we are able to Oh Lord. With you all things are
possible Oh Lord, so even when it is difficult to honor parents, we ask
you for your strength and wisdom to do what you ask us to. Thank you so
much Jesus, honoring parents and meeting their needs is taken so
seriously by you that you were upset with the Pharisees and teachers of
the law for not doing that. Help us not to go their path but to walk in
the path you want for us. And Lord if our parents are not followers of
you, help our actions to make them realize that something is different
about us. No matter what conflicts we have had, we ask you for your help
so we can honor our parents. Thank you so much Jesus for helping us.
Thank you for hearing us and answering us! I pray right now for the one
who has difficulty to face their parent/parents. Help them to have the
love you shower upon them and exhibit that love with your help. I ask
that for myself too. Thank you so much Jesus! Please Jesus be our All in
All through what we all face in life that we can be who you would want
us to be. We need you more than ever. We want to feel your hands around
us holding us tight. We want your love to surround us all through the
night. We want your presence to glow in our lives. Thank you for loving
me. You hear our voice when we cry for your help! Thank you for your
help Jesus. Thank you that you have heard us and answered us! In Your
Name I Pray Jesus! Amen!
