Ramesh C. Reddy
Editor in Chief
Hi everyone :)
May you know the Lord loves you and He will be the best parent you can ever have! Amen!
Today is September 06, 2002 so my Quiet Times I had my Quiet Times in Proverbs 6, Psalm 96, and Mark 6.
“Young man, obey your father and your mother. Take to heart all of their advice; keep in mind everything they tell you. Every day and all night long their counsel will lead you and save you from harm; when you wake up in the morning, let their instructions guide you into the new day. For their advice is a beam of light directed into the dark corners of your mind to warn you of danger and to give you a good life.” (Proverbs 6:21-23)
I saw important commands in this passage as I read it regarding parent-child relationships. We are called the children of God regardless of our age if we belong to Him. As long as we belong to our parents and they are our guardians we will still be their children regardless of our age and this is what we are asked to do:
It is good to know they are not commands alone because then it would be ‘Do it just because I said so.’ That would make us all robots and we are not robots. On the contrary, wonderful reasoning is given for us to do those things.
I was excited to read that God gives us commandments but also gives us reasons why we should follow those commandments without saying, “You don’t have to have a reason, just do it.” Here are the reasons given.
1. Every day their counsel will lead you.
2. Every night their counsel will lead you.
3. Every day their counsel will save you from harm.
4. Every night their counsel will save you from harm.
5. Their advice will become a beam of light directed into the dark corners of your mind.
6. Their advice will become a beam of light to warn you of danger.
7. Their advice will become a beam of light to give you a good life.
As I learned about those reasons and listed them to myself I was happy. Your personality might be different but I am the kind of person that needs a good reason to do things. It is really hard for me to do things just because someone says, “Just do it because I said so!”
I thought to myself, sadly a lot of times parents do that to their children without giving them any good reason just because they are in authority. Sadly that authority could be dictatorial and authoritarian that could hurt the child’s feelings and make the child feel not worthy or loved. Nobody wants to be a pawn being moved around without any reason.
I am very externally motivated meaning there should be external factors involved for me to do things well and be excited to do things.
If a parent just says ‘You should do it because I want you to’ that is not a good reason for me to want to do things because I have not been given ‘why I should do what I am asked to do’. If the ‘why’ question is answered ‘they have given me a reason why I should do something’ even if I don’t agree with the reasoning. It is much easier to obey if it is the right thing to do even if I am not comfortable with the decision.
It is not just parental authority for me but any kind of authority. I feel like a pawn moved being around and around when I am forced to do stuff just because someone is in authority. If reasons are given to me that is different.
Why do I share all this with you about my personality?
It is not to justify disobedience when reasoning is not given for us to do the things that we have been asked. On the contrary, it is to obey because God loves us and has given us the reasons why we should even if our parent/s do.
I ask you now dear friends, what comes to mind when you see ‘parent?
Dear friends, you may live in a household where your parent/s are authoritarian and dictatorial and everything ends with ‘because I said so do it’. That can be so hard and demeaning. It could make the person feel not loved and worthy but being pushed around. When you are living at home, you may feel like a prisoner because there is so much you want to do but cannot do. You may want to just fly away and go your own path all because a parent/s demands obedience. There is no reasoning behind it and even when there is a reason, it is so lame. That can be so hard.
So, when you have a chance to attain freedom from your parent/s, you could jump for joy to experience that freedom. In the process, with freedom also comes danger many times. When we are free to do our own things is when we get into trouble the most.
The classic example is ‘under-aged drinking’. It is amazing how many students’ names I have seen in the police blotter of the Pitt News. They are free from their parental authority but have they been free from the law? They have hurt themselves.
Why am I sharing 2 sides of the same coin?
On one hand, I am saying, “It is so hard to obey someone who does not give a good reason.” On the other hand, I am saying, “It can be hard to obey but if it is the right thing to do, we should
I share this with you because sadly love is not shown to their children by all parents but through this all, GOD gives you awesome promises for you to be obedient. He gives you the reasons for obeying even if your parent/s do not give them to you. He loves you and promises you blessings.
When you are told to do something and are not given a reason to do it, remember God has already given you the reasons to do it in His Word. Go out in faith and do it whatever your parents ask you to do.
Sometimes it can be really hard to obey certain things. It may seem easier to do things our way but there could be danger and harm ahead that we do not even anticipate. It would be so much easier to obey from the beginning depending on the Lord.
God will not ask you to do anything that is contrary to His Word so if parent/s ask you to do something that is contrary to the Word of God, you need not do it because the Bible says it is better to obey God than man.
If it is not contrary to the Word of God, it could be that God is trying to speak to you through those He has placed in authority over you. Rather than grumbling or feeling bitter, go ahead and do it as you take your pain to the Lord. Don’t decide to do things only if a reason is given even if that is your personality.
Lord will reward you for being obedient even if the circumstances right now look bad and you just don’t want to be where you are. Jesus loves you so much that He will not give you more than you can handle. Yes, friend the Lord loves you, Yes He does!
I know an earthly father who does not show love to their child, gives a bad impression of Father God to the child. They project their dad/guardian’s behavior and think God is like that too.
I want you to know that is not the case from personal experience. Being a Christian and my dad not being a Christian had been really hard on my life. There has been a lot of baggage. But you know the Lord knew I was carrying that baggage.
God showed me His love as my Heavenly Father is unconditional without strings attached. His love and care is unlike any human beings love. Yet, we are people famished for earthly love from both parents. Sometimes that does not happen and it is good to know how much your Heavenly Father can meet you where you are at.
The Bible reminds me, how great is the love the Father has lavished upon us that we should be called His dear children according to 1 John 3:1. That is an awesome promise to claim and remember whatever is happening here on earth.
From personal experience I can tell you that the times I obeyed my dad after testing it with Scripture, things have gone well even though he is not a believer. The same thing goes with my mom especially who is such a cool follower of Jesus.
God has shown me His love through the way He has used my mom’s love to show a glimpse of Christ’s love for me. My mom gives reasons to obey and makes it easier for me even though sadly I have not always obeyed and reaped the consequences.
Whatever the Lord tells us, it is for our own good. So no matter where you are at whether at home or away from home, remember to obey/honor your parents because the Lord has given them to you. Also, know our obedience is to the Lord first and everything flows from that. There maybe things that go against God’s Word and you should take a stand for that!
That happens a lot with Muslims who convert to Christianity when it comes to their parents. My dad is a Hindu but I know the Lord can work in His heart too.
I am so thankful that our Lord also provides us spiritual parent/s if our parent/s are not believers to help us in our walk. Hold on to the Lord wherever you are and if you are away from your parent/s, remember we can never be away from the Lord. He will be wherever we are and may His Word guide us all and lead us in the path of Everlasting life! Amen! Jesus will be the best parent for you promising assurance, redeemer encourages now today!
Promising Assurance, Redeemer Encourages Now Today! (P.A.R.E.N.T)
Prayer:
Dear Lord Jesus, I love you so much. Thank you for loving me and dying for my sins. Thank you for coming back to life to save me. Lord, you want us to obey those in authority over us but it is not always easy. I thank you when we are not given reasons to obey, you love us so much and you have given us reasons to hold on to and be obedient to our parents. Thank you for loving us and caring for us. Help us and give us strength to do things that we do not want to do but they are what we are asked to do if it is not contrary to your Word. Thank you so much Jesus. In Your Name I Pray. Thank you for giving me your Word and what I have learned today from it and have been able to share it with others. In Your Name I Pray Jesus! Amen!
Love in Christ,
Ramesh